That's right, I'm almost done with no-sugar-for-lent. It has been a rough, no-rewards journey. Next Sunday, as the world celebrates the resurrection of our Savior, I will commemorate the concurrent close of the ascetic season with a truckload of Reese's Peanut Butter Eggs and these two sugar-coma-inducing recipes I have been eyeballing for a month.
The secret truth is, I don't feel like this sugar-heist got me anywhere I'd envisioned or wanted to go. I've gained 5 pounds. I've felt HORRIBLE about myself when in desperation I've jumped onto such grey-area foods as yogurt-covered raisins, carrot-blueberry muffins, and sugar-free chocolate. I feel a little bit less healthy than I did before, when I still had my idealistic faith in the edict that sugar is toxic and that my 52-day sugar fast would rid me of my sweet tooth and set me on a more pristine, composed, and healthy life path than the cupcake-lined path I slogged along before.*
Thus I find myself this Friday morning with a commitment to see the course, but vanished enthusiasm for the game. As I polish off my second costco bag of dried fruit (they taste like gummies!), I attempt to make sense of the last two months and to spy out where I should go from here. I do NOT accept defeat easily. I wanted this sugar fast to really have an impact instead of make me hungry for two months. I have actually been mulling over the idea to keep on with the sugar fast after Lent, see if the change from rainy spring to outdoors-filled sunny spring will help any. My reasoning looks like this:
Good: I can fall asleep on demand and wake up feeling more refreshed than in months past. Must continue.
Bad: I have most definitely subsidized the sugar-gap with carbs (Popcorn! Wheat-thins! Baked Mac n'Cheese! Anything to make me feel full!!) Must quit this.
Good: I saved money. Must always do this.
Bad: I rarely work out now, although that could be a combination of allergies, three weeks of rain, and the lack of sugar to guilt me into working out on a weekly basis. MUST do better!
Good: I proved to myself that I have real will-power during the ultimate test a few weeks ago: I sat and ordered only diet Coke for dessert on a date at the Carlyle!! Go me.
Bad: I had to sit and watch my date and some other people enjoy a famed white chocolate bread pudding and an enormous slice of apple-pie-almond-streusel at the Carlyle for a solid forty minutes! Sad day.
I know several other people that have done the sugar-fast this season, does anyone have any differing conclusions? I'd love to hear stories!
I'm back from a run. Today was the first day of the year that I could actually feel heat rising from the blacktop as I ran (the kind of atmosphere that turns me into a consistent outdoor runner). Today was the first day I've topped four miles in MONTHS! I ran 5.58 miles today at a consistent pace, and if you know me, that is a miracle. I am very much a sprint-walk-sprint-walk type of runner. Sustained pacing seems to be completely incompatible with my impatient little legs, which is why I'll never run a marathon (without great pain and frustration and cursing at whatever hot boyfriend made me run it with him). Maybe this sugar-fast DOES have more pluses to it than I thought.
While I was running, I decided on a new course. I am indeed going to continue with this sugarless experiment after Easter. I failed my sugar fast, and after Easter I'll go at it again throughout the weeks, although I will afford myself a little more leniency when friends are going out for dessert or when I have a hankering to bake. Given the upswing in outside temperature and the ample time I have for running now, I think I could pull this off til my birthday, in June.
Call me crazy. Sometimes you just want to experiment with life, right?
I might have a celebratory Milkshake cupcake next week (yes, that's one of Crumbs' flavors). I might make those peanut butter chocolate cookies I mentioned before and stuff myself and my friends silly Easter weekend. But come April 25th (Happy Birthday Katie!), I'm gonna keep on going. For funzies.